"Confederate Christmas" by Dan Nance

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  1. Don’t y’all know… Santa comes from the SOUTH Pole and all that NORTH Pole garbage is because of long-legged Yankee lies in our education system. True revisionist history to warm our hearts in the holiday season. 🙂

  2. Dec. 24, 1863: Santa Claus surrenders to Nathan Bedford Forrest after a particularly sharp night action in western Tennessee. Tomorrow the men of Forrest’s Escort will feast on reindeer.

  3. “Swords? Guns? Bugles? I asked you for full rations for my men as well as new horses to replace the ones that we’ve ridden nearly to death. Private Jenkins letter to you explicitly asked for new socks for the whole command. And you bring us guns? Jefferson Davis, take off that beard.”

    • The secular assault against Christmas and all things Southern continues. So sad.

  4. Say what you like about the historical inaccuracies, but many people will buy this print and put it in their homes.

  5. Mr. Levin, I understand the joke but here it goes:

    One, where are they? I admit to having spent a handful of winters in the South, but that snow-covered landscape looks more like Vermont than Virginia. Maybe parts of northwestern Virginia, East Tennessee or western North Carolina could look like that but seeing uniformed Confederate soldiers there would have been rare.

    Second, it uses the modern representation of Santa Claus rather than the one more common to the 1860s.

    Third, unless Santa raided a department store in a northern city beforehand, those goods would have been in short supply in the Confederacy. But it is Christmas.

    • I appreciate the comments, but you are taking this way too seriously. It’s simply a ridiculous print that we are having some fun with today.

  6. My point exactly: neo-Confederates pride themselves on being historically ‘accurate’ yet pay good money for things that clearly break that rule. Caveat emptor, as always.

    The only real Christmas gift of the Civil War was the city of Savannah, given by Sherman to President Lincoln in December 1864.

  7. I’ve lived in (northern) Virginia for over 20 years and I have seen snow like that here. However, it doesn’t last very long. A few days of sun and temperatures in the 40s and it’ll be dirty slush and mud…

    But at any rate, I’m sure Forrest would appreciate a “white” Christmas…

  8. Is Santa giving the sword to NBF or is NBF conscripting Santa into Confederate service? From what I understand is that there were between 50,000 and 100,000 Santas in Confederate service that nobody likes to talk about because it does not fit the Liberal/communist/marxist view of the war. 🙂

  9. Was this picture made as a joke, or is it actually something the artist is selling? Either way, that’s hilarious.

    • It’s definitely for sale and it beats Thomas Kinkaide hands down. Eat your heart out, Mort Kunstler.

  10. Actually Forrest is surrendering to Santa. You can see Santa has already got the rest of the men’s arms and equipment in his bag.

    • That’s what I thought too, ho, ho, ho! Actually, it’s Braxton Bragg in disguise and NBF is about to get a BIG Christmas surprise as soon as Bragg disarms him. 🙂

  11. It just hit me that this print is really sick. Am I really to believe that Santa is handing Forrest a sword to be used to kill people. This dude is really disturbed. Oh well, Merry Christmas. LOL

    • Wait, you’re just now realizing that this print is sick? 🙂

      I’m curious to know what happened to Santa’s reindeer. Perhaps they were conscripted into Confederate service!

      • NO! They all volunteered, and over 100,000 magic reindeer served in the Confederate Army, but that fact was hidden by Yankee historians! And Jackson had an honor guard of 2 regiments of elves… Alas, because they were all so short (being elves and all) they never show up in photos….

    • You forget that CS Lewis has Santa doing the same thing in The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe – handing out swords and knives to fight the White Witch.

  12. Actually, this is the Last Meeting of Forrest and Santa. Later, Santa was accidentally shot by his own elves as he was returning to the North Pole.

  13. Great picture. I was in Northeast Alabama in November years ago and got hit with a sudden blizzard. At least five inches of snow. Everything down, telephone lines, power, highways, you name it. Was really lucky in that my wife and I were trapped at a real nice holiday inn and I was able to walk to a Wal-Mart and get their last pair of good rubber boots.
    Yes it does snow like that sometimes in the sunny south and since no one knows how to drive in that kind of weather the number of accidents rises to the tenth power.
    Yes, I do think it is NBF surrendering to Santa – that’s the only version that makes any sense.

    Here is the REAL VERSION, not some neo-confederate composite:


  14. Amusing as it may be. General Forrest was awesome. He lost his father when he was 16 and went on to be a self made wealthy man that financed and raised his own unit.
    In February 1862, Forrest’s unit was stationed at Fort Donelson on the Cumberland when Gen. Ulysses S. Grant forced its surrender. Rather than accept Gen. Buckner’s decision to capitulate, Forrest and his men slipped away, through the snow, and fought at the Battle of Shiloh less than two months later. That summer he began to make the kind of lightning raids that made him perhaps the single most feared cavalry commander of the entire war and earned him the nickname “the wizard of the saddle.”
    Forrest won one of his greatest victories at Brice’s Cross Roads, defeating a force twice the size of his own. His legend was constantly growing. That year, Gen. William Tecumseh Sherman declared: “that devil Forrest must be hunted down and killed if it costs ten thousand lives and bankrupts the federal treasury.”

    • Yes, he financed his own unit with the wealth accumulated trading slaves. Really “awesome” dude.

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